Xander Quotes

I laugh in the face of danger. Then I hide until it goes away.

I'm not gonna waste the perfect comeback on you now. But don't think I don't have it. Oh yes, it's time will come!

If anyone sees my spine laying around, just try not to step on it.

Forgiveness is my middle name! Well, actually it's LaVelle, and I'd appreciate it if you guard that secret with your life.

You should never hurt the feelings of a brutal killer. You know, that's, uh, that's actually some pretty good advice.

I happen to be very bitable, pal. I'm moist and delicious.

I could smack you so hard your eyeballs would switch sockets.

I don't know about you, but I'm gonna go trade my cow for some beans. No one else is seeing the funny here.

When it's dark, and I'm all alone, and I'm scared or freaked out or whatever, I always think – ‚What would Buffy do?“ You're my hero. Okay, sometimes when it's dark, and I'm all alone, I'd think, ‚What is Buffy wearing?“

Whoa, let's stop this crazy whirlygig of fun. I'm dizzy.‚

The first day of kindergarten, you cried because you broke the yellow crayon, and you were too afraid to tell anyone. You've come pretty far. Ending the world, not a terrific notion. But the thing is, yeah, I love you. I love crayon-breaky Willow, and I love scary-veiny Willow.

'Something weird is going on.' Isn't that our school motto?

Oh, c'mon, you can tell us. We're your bosom friends! The friends of your bosom!

It's comforting to know that I lack the culinary finesse of a caveman.

I'm gonna do what any man would do about it: somethin' damn manly.

Those wacky vampires! That's why I love 'em! They just keep you guessing!

Ooo, gang, did ya hear that? A bonus day of class plus Cordelia! Mix in a little rectal surgery, and it's my best day ever!

Whoa. Whoa! I... I think I'm having a thought. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's a thought. Now I'm having a plan...Now I'm having a wiggins.

He was right behind me, putting his sneakers on. But it's not the Velcro kind, so give him a couple of extra minutes

Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to anger. No, wait, hold on. Fear leads to hate, hate leads to the dark side. Hold on, no... First you get the women, then you get the money, then you... Okay, can we forget that?

When it's dark, and I'm all alone, and I'm scared or freaked out or whatever, I always think "What would Buffy do?" You're my hero. Okay, sometimes when it's dark, and I'm all alone, I'd think, "What is Buffy wearing?"